An open letter from Jani…
My Wedding
Photography: DivineMethod Photography
Although weddings are a time of joy and excitement they are also a time of stress and anxiety and a lot of misunderstandings among family and friends. And I’m sure previous brides can really nod in approval when they read this because they have probably experienced it in some place throughout their own wedding. Our loved ones are definitely worth the effort but sometimes everyone's perspectives and needs don't line up.
Luckily there is a way to detour from the frustration with Thaali. And that’s what I really love about Thaali, and why it plays a vital role in your wedding! Invented solely for Tamil Hindu weddings, it plays a huge role in being able to incorporate family, all of your family, even if you have it all figured out.
We live in a time where thanks to internet, social media, and movies everyone has an idea of what they want their wedding to look like before they have a ring or even a significant other! With inspiration oozing everywhere you already know exactly what you want, when it comes time to wedding plan there really is no need to sit down with friends and family and prep, the stress really lies in booking all the vendors you have chosen!
This causes a lot of tension between family, because families feels the need to be consulted and give their input, and really help you every step of the way. It’s not that brides aren't open to input, the clash happens when brides already have their minds made, it’s really just wasting time in the brides eye to brainstorm an already finalized decision. I personally ran into this problem in my own wedding and it can get really nasty. Clashing mindsets/perspectives is the easiest way to put it.
Luckily there is a way to detour from the frustration with Thaali. And that’s what I really love about Thaali, and why it plays a vital role in your wedding! Invented solely for Tamil Hindu weddings, it plays a huge role in being able to incorporate family, all of your family, even if you have it all figured out.
Thanks to Thaali, no matter how small the input they still feel important, and involved in your wedding planning process.
One of the first things I hear from a lot of my brides when they see the planner is “my mom will really love this” or “my dad is going to use this more than me” and it’s so true and it makes me content that it’s playing it’s part correctly; really making wedding planning a memorable experience.
You can print another copy of the “wedding checklist” and hand it to your sibling and tell him/her it’s their responsibility to make sure you’re on track and up to date with everything. Regardless of how organized you are, it lets them feel involved. You can pull out one of the “option charts” and hand it to a sister, brother or even your sister in law and tell them to research a couple makeup artists for the bridesmaids or look into favors, etc. Perhaps your mom is picking her own makeup artist, you can hand her the planner and tell her to fill out the “Bride’s Family Makeup and Hair”. Your dad can take care of the “Nadheswaram”, “Priest” and “Catering” sections.
Thanks to Thaali, no matter how small the input they still feel important, and involved in your wedding planning process.
There really is a place for everyone to really play their part and feel included, and when they all see Thaali lying somewhere in the house they will feel a sense of belonging, responsibility, and warmth because now the planner that you keep so close to plan your wedding is also the planner they reach for to plan their daughter or their sisters' wedding and it has a way of drawing everyone so close.